Sharing My Scars

Over the past few months I've had the opportunity to share about my experiences in Uganda with many different people in both my home church and with extended family. Many of those who read this blog were able to come to hear me give my presentation either at Frankston or Rokeby, or watched the recording. 

I love to talk about my time in Uganda but I also find it difficult as I bare my soul afresh to the heartaches. I wrote out most of my presentation word for word because I knew I'd be a mess of tears by the end. Sure enough, by the time I reached my conclusion, the words on the page were a mere blur. 

I knew it had to be that way though. After all how can I relate what it was really like for me without showing the scars left on my heart? My scars are beautiful though as each one shows where I've been hurt but God has healed me.

The following is the conclusion I gave to both my presentations. These are my most recent scars. One day, after all the scars are healed, maybe my heart will look a little more like Christ's. 

 Reality

I’ve had a few people ask me how it’s been coming back to reality here. The truth is that I think that being over there is more like reality than being here. What I mean is that being in such an environment forced me to grapple every day with issues of this life in a way I don’t experience in my mon-fri job.

What were only ideas and inklings to me became reality.

The idea of poverty, becomes reality, as I visit a family that has no roof in the middle of the rainy season.

The idea of malnutrition and starvation becomes reality, as I watch a 1 year old so weak he can’t even lift his head.

The idea of being orphaned becomes reality, as I walk hand in hand chatting to a young girl who looks at me as if I’m the most privileged person on earth to still have a father that is alive.

The idea of abandonment becomes a reality as a the two year old boy at my side asks if he can be my son.

And in all this painful reality that I was faced with every day, God showed Himself to be real too, and faithful. Like a diamond shines brighter against a black background so too does God’s goodness shine clearer in midst of suffering and pain.

As I became tired and weak, He showed Himself to be my source of strength and courage.

As I struggled with my own limitations and helplessness, He showed Hi s limitless power and perfect understanding.

As I discovered more and more my own insufficiency, He showed Himself to be sufficient in any and every circumstance.

Both the joys and the heartaches make me look forward to eternity all the more. I put my trust in God for the future of both these precious children and my own.

I just want to finish with a verse which shows my hope for eternity , when I will experience the full reality of Christ in all His glory, with none of the pain of this world, for He took all this world’s suffering onto Himself.

 “For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known.”

1 Corinthians 13:12