A Week Later....

Things I'd forgotten....

• I can drive a car!
• I own and carry something called a phone
• There is such a thing as proper lighting inside
• I have to wear a seatbelt
• Clothing like jeans, socks and closed toed shoes
• I have to stand still in church :)
• I can purchase things with a card
• Australian money is plastic
• Australians swear... a lot
• What real cold feels like!

Yes, it's different being home. A week down and I'm mostly back into routine. Back to "normal" life. It doesn't feel normal any more though. 

It was lovely, on Sunday, to see all my church family again and thank those who have supported me in prayer and been faithful readers of this blog. Those who have continued to care about me, even a continent away, I feel closer to for the whole experience. On the other hand there are many people who will never understand what it's like to do something like this. I get questions like "how was your holiday?" and I smile and say "fine". Or when people talk about coming back to "reality" (when being there feels more "real" than here sometimes). How do I begin to explain what God has taught me? 

I haven't had culture shock as bad as I did when returning from Malawi. God caused me to struggle through many issues when I was still in Uganda and I've returned home having already worked through many questions from my heart with Him. Though He has torn me open and exposed my heart to such an ache, I am richer for the experience and would do it again in a heartbeat. Twice now I've been told that there is a certain glow about me. I think that the "glow" that people see is when others recognise that deep spring of joy inside of me that God fills up each and every day. I feel like I'm glowing too, glowing with His joy. 

I'm not the same. I never will be the same person I was when I left. Praise God, He never stops working on me. I'm not finished yet and He'll continue to break me open and expose the deepest corners of my heart to His saving grace and mercy until the day I enter eternity. 

"For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for the Saviour, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body that it may be conformed to His glorious body, according to the working by which He is able even to subdue all things to Himself."
Philippians 3:20-21

A Love so Great

My last morning. I got out of bed at the same time I always do but didn't head down to the nursery. It felt strangely surreal to still be there but apart from everything. I was leaving. 

I finished up all the last minute packing and tidying up of the guesthouse. After I'd finished everything I headed down to the nursery to say goodbye to this shift of mamas and a have a last cuddle with the babies. 
The babies all seemed to want to be held at once which is unusual. Mama Dorothy said "the Spirit is telling them that you are leaving". Mama Dorothy gave me her long parting blessing which I'm told she only does for special volunteers. I felt privileged to receive it. All the mamas sent greetings with me back home to my parents, family and church. 
Poor John couldn't understand why I'd put him down so soon and I had to walk out the gate with him crying for me to pick him up. He'll be fine, the question is will I? 

I then headed over to the boys cottage to do goodbyes again. Some scrambled to give me hugs and others quietly waited for me to call their name for a hug. The question is always "who will be our new aunty?" I couldn't answer that. I knew that have a new aunty soon but who they were I had no clue. God will bring them the people they need. 

Richard was still under the impression that he was coming with me. I had to explain again that he was only going part way and then returning home. I left him with his head down in disappointment. How much fully sinks into the boys, I don't know. They still asked if I was going to read them a bedtime story tonight. No, no more bedtime stories from me. No more butterfly kisses and whispering "I love you" in their ears. I'm going to get in the car and probably never see them again. My heart screams, How can you do this? How can you keep putting one foot in front of the other when it's taking you far away from those you love? but I continued on, closed the door behind me and collected my bags. 

Richard was coming with me part of the way. Emma had to take him into Kampala to see a doctor about some ear problems. Becky even joined us for the ride as she had some work to do there. So it was a nice full car for the majority of the ride. Richard enjoyed every moment as the little ones don't often get car rides. 

We stopped for lunch at a Mexican restaurant that I'd been to once before. Richard asked me "Aunty, is this Australia?" Poor child has no concept of how far away it really is. Then again, maybe that's a good thing. I left them to finish their lunch and continued on with my driver to Entebbe. He didn't really know where he was going and had to stop for directions twice but he eventually found the main road and we continued on our journey. A little while before the airport we went through a road block and I had to get out of the car to empty my purse and go through metal detector while the driver waited for me a few hundred meters ahead. I made it to the airport at around 2pm. The driver carried my bags for me almost to check in and then I paid him for parking and thanked him before he left me. I was on my own again. 

Check in was quick and I met an Aussie girl in the queue who'd just spent the same amount of time volunteering in a different orphanage. I was thankful that I'd got there earlier as my flight had been moved forward an hour which I didn't realise. 

As I boarded the plane, settled into my seat and waiting for take off again that corner of my heart screamed take me back! I don't want to leave! 

Traveling was much the same as it always is, tiring, long, boring. My flight was delayed at Doha and we waited on the plane for almost an hour before take off. I slept quite a bit of those 13 hours, exhaustion taking over and overcoming the fact that sleeping is almost impossible in an airplane seat. 

I have moments of excitement and moments of irrational panic, moments of calm and moments of fear, moments of peaceful acceptance and moments of longing. Ask me how I feel? You just might get a different answer from me at different moments. In the long quiet hours that is traveling, I find myself daydreaming of two different places. The moment when I walk through those doors and I see my family again has played over and over in my mind. Yet, just as often my mind travels back and my arms ache with emptiness. There's something missing. I'm not the same. I've grown used to having a small person depending on me for their every need and comfort. Where are they? Where is that small wriggling child ever constant in my arms?

Things I miss already....

• baby tears on my shoulder
• reaching out to steady uncertain steps
• eyes that light up when I walk in the room
• being called "Aunty"
• hands that are always reaching for mine
• cries for attention
• giggles of laughter
• tired eyes that watch my face as I sing softly 
• dimpled cheeks
• cheeky grins of mischief

There's much more but these are the main things and the list could go on forever if I tried to record everything. One thing I felt which I'd never experienced before is that deep love for someone that isn't returned the same way, a love so great that they'll never truly understand how much I love them. They'll never know how much I care. They'll never remember my name. They may never know that wherever they go in the world someone loves them, cares for them and prays for them. 

God knows though. He is a Father. He cares for His children that don't fully comprehend Him, that can't fully grasp the depth of His love, that take for granted the fact He is even there. 

Nothing compares to His love. 

Thank you, Lord, for giving me another glimpse of Yourself through these children. 

I will lift up my eyes to the hills-

From whence comes my help?

My help comes from the LORD, 

Who made heaven and earth. 

He will not allow your foot to be moved;

He who keeps you will not slumber.

Behold, He who keeps Israel

Shall neither slumber nor sleep.

The LORD is your keeper; 

The LORD is your shade at your right hand. 

The sun shall not strike you by day, 

Nor the moon by night.

The LORD shall preserve you from all evil;

He shall preserve your soul.

The LORD shall preserve your going out and your coming in

From this time forth, and even forevermore. 

Psalm 121

A Child's Prayer

It's hard to imagine that I'll be leaving tomorrow. Today was much like any other day. Sometimes I almost forgot that it was my last day of work here. 

Mama Georgina and I took a whole lot of kids on a walk today and we were able to take almost all of my boys. I was glad I got the chance to have one more walk. 

A bright moment to cheer up my morning. While taking Mercy over to the girl's cottage this morning Lydia had picked this flower for me. I'd forgotten about after placing it on the table upstairs until coming up for my lunch break and finding it placed in a cup with a wet cloth. Mama Josephine knows just how to bring a smile to my face:). I love having flowers in vases around me and this one means more than most. As I sit typing this blog it sits beside me dropping it's petals and subtly reminding me of flowers fading (Isaiah 40:7). 

I caught a boda into town after lunch; I had one last thing I wanted to get before leaving. It didn't take long and I started to start walking home instead of paying for a boda. I hadn't quite got half way when a car pulled up beside me and someone called my name. It was one of the night mamas and her brother with someone from church in the back. So they gave me a lift home which saved me some time. 

I'd promised each child a balloon today after their nap. It worked out well as it began to rain not long after I got back from town and the kids where cooped up inside. I went around to each cottage and blew up a balloon for each child and spent a little while playing with them. When the rain stopped the children were allowed out onto the porch and I simple sat and cuddled them along with some singing.  

Edmund tried very hard to eat his balloon:).

I felt bad, Richard's balloon popped in his face and he ended up with a split above his eyebrow. Who knew balloons could be so dangerous? 

This little guy (Babu) spent a fair amount of time on my lap. I'm almost constantly wiping his nose at the moment, of course, he thinks it's just as easy to bury his head in my t-shirt which sort of does have the same effect. :)

My last bedtime with the babies. 

The shift changes tomorrow so it's the last I'll see of my two Mama Betty's.

Mama Betty on the right said to me that the babies will be bored without me and then added that the mamas will be bored too:). 

After putting the babies to bed and blessing each one as is my usual habit I hugged all the mamas on shift and said goodbye to the kids in the other cottages. Jonah and Elijah even taught me what "Aunty Londa does" in their bedtime routine:). 

Mama Georgina with the scarf I gave her. 

I spent a long time saying goodnight to the boys tonight. I was doing pretty well emotionally, choking a little on tears when Paul gave me hug and whispered "I love you" in my ear. Then, I crumbled a little more when Christopher asked if he could pray for me. I couldn't understand what he was saying or even if he really said anything but he put his hands together, closed his eyes and murmured in my ear. I can't even think about this now without crying. He may never remember me but I'll never forget him and all the boys that have become so much a part of me. One of the mamas in the girl's cottage told me to never stop praying for the children; to never stop asking for them to grow in Godliness. That's what an aunty does, isn't it? Though we may be oceans apart, God is everywhere and He hears my prayers as well as theirs. Lord, bless these little ones, may they always know Your everlasting love. 

Emma invited me out for a milkshake at The Keep with her after dinner. It was nice to take the opportunity to talk about our days and the children and give me something to do before finishing off my packing. She'll be coming with me for most of the way to the airport tomorrow. We leave at 10am and Emma is bringing Richard for an appointment in Kampala while I continue on to Entebbe. My flight leaves at 5:50pm Ugandan time and I change planes in Qatar before arriving home, God willing, at around 9:30pm on Thursday. 

Thank you, everyone, for your prayers while I've been here and for my travels. Please continue to pray for me as the reality of leaving hits me and especially for the all the children without aunties for a short amount of time. 

"And now, Lord, what do I wait for? My hope is in You."

Psalm 39:7

The Lone Aunty

I'm now the lone aunty. 

I'm used to the mornings being quiet but it was strange not to have Elena fast asleep on the couch and Londa quietly reading when I left for the nursery today. 

After my morning in the nursery I decided to help Mary with the older preschool in order to spend time with Christopher and Frank. It was great fun and a nice change since I haven't helped out with preschool since I started in the nursery. 

Above is William. Having played with the dry oatmeal he rubbed the dust off his hands all over his face. He looked like a mzungu! :)

I helped out the boys with making repeating patterns on paper with coloured squares.

During lunch today, I was getting the babies ready for their naps while the older boys were eating. All of a sudden I hear screams and Sande comes running and crying like somethings trying to kill him. I went to see what was happening and found the boys all sitting as far away from the table as they could. The culprit? A tiny gecko about two centimeters long that had come out from under the table! The poor thing was probably more scared than the boys and I quickly took it outside before calming the boys down. The mamas were laughing as I shook my head and tried to convince the boys that a gecko could not hurt them. :)

Thought I'd better take a photo of my last meal of sweet potato and g-nut sauce. 

Physical therapy was canceled today as there was no one to go with me and the kids. So I decided to walk into town for my break to get the last few things I needed before heading home (as in lots of tea). I enjoyed wandering around by myself and looking in the little shops. I made another friend in one of the shops. I'm so glad I can honestly tell people that I don't have facebook! Anyway, making friends means you get better deals and haggling is easier. He said I was very swag, which basically means I'm cool:). Haha...time to leave the shop! :D

I managed to find one of the few boda drivers that knew exactly where to go and so I was able to enjoy the ride home without giving directions. I had just enough time to sit down for half an hour before going down to play with the kids. I spent probably an hour helping kids on the monkey bars. None of the kids can actually do it properly, they are too little, but they enjoy being held as they pretend to swing across each bar. 

Richard is brave enough that he likes to hang by himself but can't get down again. A little while later after I'd gone to play with the younger kids, Emma found him hanging from the monkey bars screaming because he'd got up by himself but couldn't get down. He was a little traumatised so I don't think he'll do it again. It was odd being the only aunty in the yard and I made sure to give a cuddle and a kiss to as many kids as I could that I knew would be missing Londa and Elena. Godfrey asked me if Londa was coming to read a story tonight. It's harder for them to understand that the girls are still going to come visit but that they aren't living at Amani anymore. 

I had a really nice bedtime with the babies and the boys. I read two chapters of a book that I'm reading through with the boys and then watched as Mama Georgina danced with Michael:). Christopher, my eldest boy, again wrapped his arms around me and said "don't go Aunty, don't go". I think he realises more than the others what it means for me to leave them. Having to reassure him gives me peace as well about leaving. As I comfort him, I comfort myself. I always tell the boys I love them before leaving, but tonight Paul said it first as I got to his bunk. He whispered it quietly in my ear just like I do with him. I almost burst into tears right there and then! 

I went upstairs a little emotional and made my dinner. I'm trying to use up what's left in the fridge as there are no volunteers coming for at least a week. I was just about to put the kettle on to make myself a cup of tea when a familiar voice called out. Anna had come to visit and say goodbye! So I made another batch of Anzac biscuits and we sat drinking tea and chatting for a few hours. She is such a lovely girl and a great encouragement to me. It was another bittersweet goodbye at the gate. God bless you, Anna, as He leads you wherever He has work for you to do!

I stayed up late to begin packing up everything. I don't want to spend all my free time packing so the more I get done at night the better. 

But of Him you are in Christ Jesus, who became for us wisdom from God- and righteousness and sanctification and redemption- that, as it is written, "He who glories, let Him glory in the LORD."

1 Corinthians 1:30-31

Eyes Fixed on Eternity

Sitting in church this morning I looked around at everyone during worship; this would be the last time I get to be a part of this. 

Only Christopher and Paul got to go to church today. Emma and Charlie were feeling unwell and so we were limited with aunties to supervise. I had already started getting my boys ready so they got to be the lucky two who went. 

It was a beautiful morning and despite the fact that computers played up and we didn't have words, it was amazing worship anyway!

Florence and I exchanged gifts as she might not be around Amani this week as she prepares to go back to school in Kampala. I'm going to miss my African friend:(. She introduced me once as her exotic friend; she'll have to come visit me in Australia so that I can introduce her as my exotic friend:). 

The plan for the afternoon was to go on a boat ride together. We didn't know much about what we were doing and Charlie couldn't come with us as planned. We were instructed to take bodas to a hotel near where we were going and then just walk through the fishing village until the boat guide found us. I guess we stand out enough that it worked perfectly! 

Walking down to the water.

A girl that has been visiting Amani came with us and brought her dad too which meant we got to take more kids. It makes it cheaper too as you just pay a set price for the ride no matter how many people come. 

So there we were cruising Lake Victoria. Sometimes I almost have to pinch myself when I realise that I'm really here, in a place that you learn about on documentaries! 

Weaver birds making their nests. 

We saw lots of different types of birds. 

Pulling in a catch of fish

If you can see, there are two groups of men apart from one another. They are pulling on the same fishing net. There is also a group of women further back who are waiting to buy the fish as soon as it is caught. Now that's fresh fish!

A pair of kingfishers, a male and female. 

There is a fishery project here and many birds hang around the nets that hold all the growing fish. 

The clouds are breathtaking!

A monitor lizard. 

We went all the way to the source of the Nile and got photos sitting on the boat. You can tell that the water starts flowing faster at this point. I can hardly imagine that this flows north as far as it does.  

My sisters and I on Lake Victoria. 

Just managed to catch an otter on the surface of the lake. Every now and then we would see one but just as quickly as they're spotted they disappear under the water again. 

Paul and I enjoyed ourselves. He was fairly quiet, just taking everything in, with the occasional, "see, Aunty!" at a bird or monkey. 

Back to shore.

It was a nice little trip and it's the first sightseeing thing I've done here!

We returned home and Londa and Elena spent the afternoon packing. We did bedtime again and Londa and Elena went around to all the cottages to say goodbye to each of the children. I was in the middle of kissing my boys goodnight when they came into my cottage. Christopher thought I was leaving too and wrapped his arms around my neck saying, "don't leave Aunty, don't go!". He was reassured that I'll still be here tomorrow but I explained that I would only have two more days with them, two more bedtime stories. We counted them out on our fingers, one, two. He was satisfied that I wasn't leaving just yet but I choked back on my emotions knowing how fast those two days will go. 

We walked down to buy chapatis and then to Charlie's to pick up some stuff for Londa and Elena. I walked quietly. I'd written what I needed to say to them in their journals but there's so much that can't be put into words. 

We quickly did photos together before we said goodbye, knowing we'd be a mess if we did them afterwards. 

Londa: we share so many things; our love of writing down whats in our hearts onto paper (though she is far better than I), of good books, and so many other things that can't be explained. She has been an amazing aunty for her boys and is truly gifted in training children in God's Word. Her boys will be lost without her. She is a woman after God's own heart and I know she will be used mightily for His Kingdom wherever she goes.

Elena: she brings joy to anyone she is with, can make friends with just about anyone, shares everyone's burdens and opens her heart to include everyone. She has touched so many here so much that most of the mamas cried when they said goodbye. She dealt so well with the dramas of a large group of young girls and she set a great example for them. She is leaving little pieces of her smile all over Jinja and God is showing His love through her to so many people. 

My fellow Amani volunteers; both daily focusing on Christ, both with a heart for missions, both wonderful aunties to the children, both shining as lights in the world (Phil 2:15). 

We prayed together and hugged each other goodbye before packing all the bags into the waiting van. I stood at the gate and waved goodbye in the dark. It was quiet upstairs and I felt this strange mix of joy and sadness. I feel sad because I miss them already but I feel so much joy because I have two wonderful friends and have been blessed so much by them. Knowing that there are two more people in the world focused on Jesus and His glory gives me so much peace. I'm excited to meet them again someday and hear what God has done through them on this earth and see the rewards that He has stored up for them in His heavenly treasury. 

Praise God for the blessings that He bestows on us, especially the blessing of friends. 

Jesus speaking to His disciples-

"Therefore you now have sorrow; but I will see you again and your heart will rejoice, and your joy no one will take from you."

John 16:22

Last Budondo Visit

It was a lovely relaxing Saturday morning together. We headed into town and wandered around the little shops on main street for a while. Heading home, Londa had a crazy boda driver and nearly slipped off the boda as he took off! 

Our last Saturday Budondo kid's club called for a photo with all the guys. Johnson was sick today so he's the only one missing. These guys always make me miss my brothers and these times are always refreshing after living in a world of women:). They've done a great job at being substitute brothers for us. 

From left to right: Timothy, John, me, Aaron, Elena, Job, Londa, Fred

We always spend an hour together over lunch at Amani planning together. This week was our turn to give the lesson while the guys interpreted so we split up and talked about the lesson that was planned. 

Job always says that it's better when we give the lesson, he says, "they listen to black women, they don't pay attention to us white guys". :)

Singing together before we start.

This is mine, Aaron, and Fred's group of 10 years and above. 

We are going through John at the moment so my lesson was on the Samaritan woman at the well while Aaron interpreted for me. It was perhaps shorter than what Aaron would do but I asked him to add something at the end. At first he didn't want to add anything but he did in the end anyway. I was able to compare the relationship between Jews and Samaritans with the way that Southern Ugandans talk about Northern Ugandans. Culturally the North is looked down upon and if you ever did something clumsy or stupid they would say you are from the North. The memory verse I chose was John 14:6 which is one of my favourites and is a truth that needs emphasising in a Muslim community. I thoroughly enjoyed teaching the kids, hearing their memory verse, and praying with them. 

Packing up at the end. 

It's amazing how far we have come with Budondo. I remember going to the kid's club the day after I arrived in Uganda and feeling a little awkward and overwhelmed. Here I was with a bunch of Ugandan men that were complete strangers; I didn't even know the girls I went with! Questions like what should I do with the kids? What should I say? How can I help when I don't know anything that's going on?! Now, it's almost funny how comfortable I am here, in fact how at home I am with these guys and these kids. I almost cried on the way home when I realised it was my last bumpy, dusty, hot ride in the rickety van with these people. I have been so blessed to be a part of reaching this community with these people. I'm so glad that these kids have a group of  such Godly men committed to going every week armed with the Word of God (and a few bags of "sweeties").

We decided that today was the best day to do last photos with the kids. 

Mama Dorothy became camera shy and the two little ones were napping but I got all the older ones and Mama Esther together anyway. It was fun trying to get them all to sit still enough to take a half decent one! 

Alex and I

We helped each other get lots of good individual photos with the kids from our cottages. I had to limit myself to only putting a few on or it would have taken forever to load all the photos for this blog!

Judah and I

Kisses from Christopher.

Christopher told me today that he was my friend:).

Hugs from Paul.

Butterfly kisses from Joseph.

Mama Rukia and I

The shift of mamas changes tomorrow so I got some with them too. 

Mama Josephine and I

Mama Josephine loves playing with the boys and they love her. She has always been one of the softest mamas and had to be told to be more firm with them. Her favourite tactic? Grasshoppers! The boys are terrified of grasshoppers and so Mama Josephine often keeps one captive in the cottage. Whenever a child is being difficult, out comes the grasshopper and the children scream and cry for mercy! 

Though Saturday nights we don't normally work, we are making the most of the few days we have left and went down for bedtime with the kids anyway. I was wearing jewelry when I went down to the boys cottage because we were going out to Charlie's straight afterwards and so the boys immediately assumed that I was off to church. It didn't matter that it was dark outside and it's Saturday, if Aunty is dressed up a little more than it must mean church! :)

We had a great night at Charlie's with Mary and Emma as well. For once the Aussie's outnumbered the Americans! :) Charlie cooked chicken, mashed potatoes and corn for us and there was also pumpkin pie for dessert. It was so good1 We watched a movie together before Charlie's night guard walked us home. 

Every night the three of us go through the little things of the day together. The funny things the children say, the touching moments, the hilarious things, and the hard things. Our hearts have grown closer together in the joys and the pain. I'm thankful that though we will soon be oceans apart that there are these women, my sisters, on earth somewhere that understand exactly what it's like to be in this place and be a part of these children's lives. 

"Through the LORD's mercies we are not consumed, because His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. The LORD is my portion, says my soul, Therefore I hope in Him!"

Lamentations 3:22-24

Worship and Praise

Happy Anzac Day! :)

Emma, the nurse at Amani, is Australian and she gave all the kids temporary tattoos today. I got one too:). It looks different on their dark skin. 

Freddy was quite proud of his belly tattoo:).

I have all my babies back in the nursery now which makes me happy:). They are still recovering and a little weak but it's nice to be able to sit and cuddle them when they're not feeling well. 

It poured down with rain last night and this morning. I got quite wet going from upstairs down to the nursery and my turned all fuzzy as it dried. The babies liked it anyway. 

When it's raining the kids get cabin fever and go a little crazy. Instead of one on ones we try and do group activities in our cottages. Elena and Londa were both doing movies in their cottages so I brought a few of my boys over to join in with Londa's boys. They don't sit still for very long but it gave them something to occupy them for a while. 

Elena had a great idea of buying chapatis for all the kids today. We went down and ordered 30 chapatis and allowed an hour and a half for him to make them. The little ones only eat maybe a third of a chapati so there was plenty for the mamas as well. We treated all the kids and mamas for the equivalent of $7 Australian. 

We spent our break shopping with Florence and I managed to get ingredients to make Anzac biscuits! I get blank looks from everyone here when I mention golden syrup, so I was pleasantly surprised to find it in the grocery store. Another "only in Africa" moment when I'm shopping and make friends with people in the supermarket! First there was a guy wandering the aisles who introduced himself and asked about me, I stopped talking when he asked where I was staying :S. When I went to pay he even packed my bag for me!

Then, as I'm searching the shelves for golden syrup, an older American couple decided they'd help me search for my list of groceries. They managed to find the golden syrup even though they'd never heard of it before and also helped me find the cheapest way to buy oats. It was refreshing, as a lot of white people here can be a little standoffish with short term volunteers, because so many come and go. 

Thankfully the sun had dried up the yard and the kids were able to run around outside. We had two guys from church come again to play with the kids; bribed by Elena with brownies:). We were discussing that it's interesting how we always say "the boys need men!" but when the guys visit it's all the little girls that flock to them. Girls need daddies and uncles just as much as boys do.

We sang songs and played circle games as usual and then just played with the kids. 

Today Paul asked me why my skin is white:).

I love that feeling of sitting and watching kids play and as I'm watching a warm hand slips into mine and a little head rests against my shoulder; or as I'm kneeling on the ground and two arms wrap themselves around my neck and small body leans on my back; or when I'm sitting cross legged in the nursery and a little person catches my eye, grins and runs/crawls over to fall into my lap, certain that I will catch them; or when I'm holding a child in my lap and as I look down, they look up and we smile at one another.

They don't realise yet that I'll be leaving soon. I can't bring myself to tell them just yet. They know what it's like when an aunty leaves, they know what it feels like to miss goodnight kisses and bedtime stories. It will only be another week and there will be more volunteers and they'll be happy again with new aunties to spoil them. I, on the other hand, will be left with 23 child shaped holes in my heart. 

After putting the boys to bed a made the Anzac biscuit batter and cooked half of them. I burnt one tray because it was too close to the bottom of the oven, but the other tray turned out well. They don't taste quite the same as normal Anzac biscuits because I had to use quick oats rather than rolled oats but they still taste okay. 

The last Friday of each month is praise and worship night at The Hub. What a great way to spend my last Friday night! There is nothing quite like worship in Africa! I think that even if you were to bring a group of Africans to Australia it still wouldn't be the same as meeting here and spending hours in song and prayer with them. We sang the song "Angus Dei" together which was amazing and powerful. As Elena and I prayed together towards the end we may have shed a few tears. We returned home, still singing "Angus Dei" and with me feeling like I'm leaving family very soon. I look forward to one day when we will worship for an eternity together before the great white throne.

"Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, Who was and is and is to come!

You are worthy, O Lord, to receive glory and honor and power; for You created all things, and by Your will they exist and were created."

Revelation 4:8,11